Who is this Jackcabnory......

London Cab Driver, part-time Singer, micro/macro blogger, runner and primary school teacher in the making.....

Wednesday, 30 April 2008

Blog oh haze-blog!

Bonjour, today is my last day of office work after nearly 20yrs and it feels very strange.... tomorrow onwards I'm officially a cabby!!

More tales follow of my days in the saddle......

As I'm in shipping (albeit for an hour!) it was interesting to discover that the Danish guy I took from Portman Sq to Portland Place was a good friend of the CEO of Maersk Line - the biggest shipping line in the world!!

Met someone for lunch near the office in London Bridge and saw The Hoosiers and Robyn recording a BBC programme in Borough Market..... you can watch it here Hoosiers were playing their new one which is earily like "Love Cats" by The Cure.

Had the best job yet last week, got flagged in Gresham St to wait in Goldsmiths Lane for someone, eventually after 2 people reassuring me that someone was coming, 2 Spanish guys arrive, imagine my glee - engine off meter on, up to £10 before we select drive, and they only went to Blackfriars!

Great example of making sure you establish the exact destination when it has an almost identical soundalike alternative. This one being a young lady going from Roland Gardens to the O2 centre - Greenwich says I, thinking I'll make this home afterwards..... no Finchley Rd she says.....

A good start the other day, 2 jobs which involved taking customer from point A to point B, waiting and then a return to Point A....... they were

Southwark St - Spa Rd
NSPCC - Hatton Garden (for wedding ring to be adjusted/altered)

A couple tip on whats good, I've always been lucky with Grays Inn, dropped off and then got another on straight out - so worth hanging around for minute or two.

The Connaught Hotel now has no loo facility, think there used to be one in the basement before but no more!

Well that's it for now, more soon

Thursday, 24 April 2008

More tales of the unexpected....

The length between posts are getting longer, but at least this will be a bumper edition..... I've taken to jotting down memorable journeys while I'm out, otherwise they all become one!

Took a lady from London Bridge one morning, she asked me to take her to Deutsche Bank on London Wall, then she says "and once you've dropped me off, can you run me over and kill me - cos I don't want to go!" I think I'd be with her if I hadn't made the choice to do the knowledge.....



My first possible chucker (he/she who looks like they will vomit!) from Victoria to Brixton, she kept hiccuping all the way, and wasn't interested in my suggestions to open the window "I'll be fine" she kept saying, she was quite clearly trollied - fortunately she kept it all in and was last seen meandering up Tulse Hill.


Met up with some new boys at the Astral cafe, one of which was Headlong, check out his blog as well. Swapped stories of fun customers and the best toilet breaks in town!

Got another celeb the other Friday, was almost finished for the night and heading east along Tooley St, hailed by a gent and his partner was Paula Wilcox - she of Man About The House and more recently, as she was eager to point out, Emmerdale (she plays Hilary Potts) they were going home to Albert Bridge Rd, then changed their minds en route to the City Inn Westminster. Very nice couple....

A good example of when it goes slightly awry...... took a lady from Seymour St to Waterloo, so I was doing my best to avoid traffic - but importantly didn't say this at the outset, a cardinal sin as I'm learning - so went down thru Berkeley Square/Piccadilly Duke St St James/Pall Mall/ etc down to Gt George..... as I'm waiting in the traffic (the first major lot) just before Parliament Sq, I ask which entrance she wants.... then she says "well we've come the long way, so the taxi rank pls"... I apologise etc and then feel quite uncomfortable until we get there - meter finishes on £13,20, I say let's call it a tenner, she says oh no, lets say £11 and we leave each other on a good note.

Got some more but I'll add them to the next post - am full time from 1st May, so looking forward to a full stretch...........

Monday, 7 April 2008

Beachcomber

It's been a while since the last one, been a bit snowed under at work handing over to my lucky successor.... and also Tiscali have continued to work at snail's pace in re-connecting our broadband!!

Been out over the last few weeks and mostly it's been ok, had a great encounter on Friday night with a guy who I picked up outside the Hilton Olympia in Kensington.

Me "Where to sir?"
He "Soho"

So of we trundle, I then decide to narrow the destination down....

Me "Where in Soho sir? do you have a venue"
He (sounded like) "Beach, I need beach"
Me "You need a club called Beach?"
He "No I need a beach, I want a beach for pleasure. I want to pay, I don't want a club. you know a house I can go to?"
Me (errr this isn't in the information pack?!?) "I know the area (I don't in that sense if my wife or mother are reading this), I can take you"

So I decide Brewer St is favourite, aiming for the variety of "Massage" signs that are evident.

He gets a bit impatient around Vigo St, obviously he's been away from home for some time and is anxious to release his frustration! We arrive at Brewer St - although not too early (boom boom) and he jumps out and duly pays the fare.

I see another couple waving on the other side of the road and take them up sharpish on their request to go to Old Church St!! Let's hope he left for Naples the next day with a little less baggage than he came with....

The evening finished very conviently for me, as I live SE and needed to end up at Millwall FC for the annual re-setting of the meter to take in the recent increase (around 4%). I get flagged on Fulham Rd nr Chelsea's ground, and get a fare to Eltham, we agree £40 and it comes to £45, so everyones happy. Off I go to Zampa Rd and in 30mins am re-tariffed and away to bed.

Went out Sat around 1pm and a slowish afternoon which improves from around 4.30ish.... I did a few jobs out of London Bridge, one down to Long Lane SE1 and then an nteresting job for anyone doing the knowledge, from Long Lane SE1 and they asked for the other Long Lane nr West Smithfield......

I'm sure I picked up a high class (although with a touch of mutton about her) call girl, she was going from the Crown Plaza in Buckingham Gate to a private members club (no pun intended, those were her exact words) in John Adam St.....

Hey ho, just over 2 weeks to go before the final plunge in full time cabbing......

Thursday, 27 March 2008

Made me laugh......




"Fine for back-to-front thong man

Batchelor had gone out in the thong to feed the pigeons a pieA 58-year-old man who fed pigeons wearing only a skimpy thong which was back to front has been fined £150. Neighbours spotted David Batchelor in his street in Perth in the underwear which left his genitals partly exposed"

Full story here

Ahh bless him, a thong the wrong way round, that's got to be uncomfortable....



Will post some more stories from the road soon.....

Wednesday, 19 March 2008

More ramblings.....

Well, more tales from the road.... can't remember too much of last weeks shenanigans to be fair, picked up Paddy McGuinness he of Max & Paddy and Phoenix Nights fame. I took him to Bafta where he's on the panel judging this year's TV entertainment gong........ nice enough chap, although my mate at Sky has told me he was a little bit xenophobic when he was on Soccer AM a while back..... anyway -speak as you find!

Picked up a group of girls in Mortimer St who were many sheets to the wind on Friday night.... I won't share with you some of the pearls of wisdom and in depth descriptions of anatomies they were spouting, I'll leave that to your imagination.....


Quick note to anyone new to the "hailing a hackney carriage game" if the "TAXI" sign is not lit/extinguished/off/not shining bright, this means said taxi is already carrying person(s) and cannot be engaged in your transportation....... this was sadly lost on the 3 blokes who, whilst I'm stationary on Oxford St with lady in back, kept remonstrating with me, I point several times to the rear compartment, but to no avail. Eventually I slide front passenger window down enough to talk "Can you, hic, go to St hic Johns Wood hic mate?" no say's I, I've got someone in the back..... "oh, hic, shorry mate"


Managed to do ok from 1 short and 2 long eve's last week, have been out today for the first trial of an "early" day. Left home about 6.15am and finished up around 3.45pm - was ok, happy enough with the winnings of the day. A few assorted city jobs this morning, a poor woman from Charing Cross who was in plaster from a ski-ing injury picked up a couple of weeks ago, proceeded to take her to Ava Maria Lane, via an assortment of embankment/Aldwych and back on embankment owing to the blinking traffic!! (that don't teach that at the PCO).....








Had my 1st trip to the House of Lords....... it's like Fort Knox in there! anyhow, I'm off now. My band (I'm sure we all call it "My" Band! but it's reasonably democratic) has plenty of plans afoot for new songs and a new marketing push..... web site needs a revamp, so anyone who knows a cheap web design/someone who needs a gerbil - no guinea pig, let me know.......


Anyone who wants to see what we're like can make their way to either


Charlton Park Rugby Club - April 12th tickets £5-7 on the door


Cutty Sark Greenwich - April 13th between 10.30/Midday on the route of the London Marathon


Will aim to get some decent pics and post them for anyone who can't make it..... oh pretend you care!!






Sunday, 9 March 2008

Cabs, gigs and stuff......

So, week 3 for anyone keeping count.... out on Wednesday feeling pretty awake (from the 9-5) so off we go with a Queen Victoria St to Royal Opera House, which then changes to a Somerset House and on to Queenstown Road, nice so far. On the way the silver shadow develops a knocking sound which I hope will pass....... it doesn't and get progressively worse as the evening draws - bit cheesed as I was hoping for a long evening in the saddle.... but as I didn't fancy the idea of waiting in nowhere junction for the breakdown at some silly time at night, I decided to get home and take it back to the garage next morning.

So, Thurs I did just that, took it in and following a sharp intake of breath, I'm told "you'll need another cab mate", but that's the beauty of rental, 10mins later I'm on my way back to the office in Hong Kong livery!

Went out Thurs from work and did a couple of hours, eventually heading for a gig at The Roundhouse Camden, so according to the law of sod, I end up at Westminster Pier at 6.45 when I'm due to meet a mate there at 7....... anyway, no prob's, using all my shortcut/back double tricks, I make it by about 7.20.... but what a gig, Mr Newton Faulkner, eagerly anticipated and not disappointed where we, a true entertainer, with just a small band, drummer and bass player who joined him sporadically for numbers.... but he was awesome, here's a clip of the night we saw him (you tube via someones mobile phone) but at least gives you a flavour.



He finished the night with a cover, just on the acoustic, of Bohemian Rhapsody - amazing and did it great justice - Freddy would be smiling up there!

So, to Friday, and the first long day in the saddle, went out at about 12, headed for Canary Wharf as suggested by others and managed to trap (apparently that's the term for getting a fare, but that's the first and last time you'll hear it from me !?!) a job to the Wolseley in Piccadilly, then some more around the west end, headed out to Kensington where I needed to get some more change (oh the joys) can't recall a lot of the others in the afternoon but ended up meeting a couple of fellow new tadpoles in the pond at around 9 at the Astral, had a great chicken curry, they no about portions there! anyway a chinwag on various jobs of the day and off I go about 10 for the last session of the night. Got a few jobs around West End, then headed back to London ?Bridge, the rank at the station was empty, so headed back on to Borough High St and got flagged by a couple of lads, "Chiswick and then Kew Bridge?" erm.... it's midnight and I'm really not sure about you boys..... oh well, in for a penny.... they jump in, quite clearly having had a skinful "Do you want some money mate?" they say, "No, as long as you've got it lads, I'll trust you" , "yeah, no worries mate....." - we'll see So off we go with me not sure for at least half the journey. But as my mother says "never judge a book by it's cover" and she was right, they were fine and I finished the night with a £35 job - It being 1.15am, I decided that was a wrap and went home.

Ventured out yesterday afternoon, but to be honest it was pretty quiet, even though it was raining ("everyone wants a cab in the rain" hmmmm?) I think what didn't help was the fact that it was International Womens Day and all the sisters were marching thru town..... I and several female passengers were at pains to understand what the point was.... but I am now reliably informed that....

"It is a major day of global celebration for the economic, political and social achievements of women"

So, go girls, you is wonderful

NB - anyone seeking more information pls go to http://www.internationalwomensday.com/

Had to make another refusal as well, I'm just turning into Queensway when a guy approaches me "Kings Rd, pls" seemed pleasant enough, then I catch sight of the Budweiser he's sipping - "Not with that I'm afraid", "Well, I need to finish it" he says... so we agree to disagree on how he'll get down to Chelsea....

I finished up about 6, all in all a good week and enough to cover the adventures of the week to come...... I'm off to watch some more of Heroes "Season" 1!

Saturday, 1 March 2008

Coffee by candlelight.....

So the end of week 2! went out each night wed-fri from the 9-5 and enjoyed again, every fare a different tale..... a few notables from this week

American couple in tux etc from Rochester Row to Natural History Museum on Wed, headed for some posh bash no doubt.......

Some French guy on the pull last night, pick him up in Ladbroke Gardens "Sutherland Ave pls" so off we go, quite straight forward Ken Park Rd/Westbourne Park etc etc, then on the way he says "after we pick my friend up, we go to Dorchester?" - no problem with me.... so eventually we find 115 Sutherland Ave (which is a bugger as there's parking in the middle of the road!!) and then off to the Dorchester. I had to laugh on the way as he does loads of wooing etc, and then a phrase which shows he up to date with modern web social networking "Are you on Facebook", well it made me chuckle.

Took another group of togged up City folk from Fenchurch St to the Whitbread Brewery for a bash.......

Met up with my ex-cop who is in his first week for a coffee at the Astral last night, but when we got there it has echoes of the war!!! there they were mid power cut, desperately providing sustenance to fellow licensed boys in need for watering.... unfortunately for Mr D (my ex-cop, although he still is a cop!) they were not able to provide a hot coffee for which he was hankering!

Lastly had my first refusal last night, had parked in the rank in Glasshouse St for a necessary WC break and sandwich, when an Irish fella comes to the passenger side front window. He brandishes his phone, so I drop the window enough to take it and read the message about meeting a friend in St Martins Lane "come on mate, I'll give you £15" no I said, I'm having a break, more remonstrations follow, and I re-iterate that I'm not up for it (a) sandwich half finished b) didn't like the look of him, maybe he was kosher, but better safe that etc... I did try and direct him the few hundred yards straight across Leicester Sq, which would have been as quick as a cab ride and cheaper.....


Anyway, that's all for now, eldest has come down with pox that the youngest had a couple of weeks ago, so my birthday celeb's will have to be low key this year.....

More stories from the smoke soon.....